I would like to own an exotic cat one day.

I didn't listen to as many Christmas songs as I usually do this year. I didn't really get in the holiday spirit, at least not to a big extent, and I didn't go crazy wrapping gifts. Still though, it was a great Christmas, and I'm glad that I have the family that I do. I am now in one of those moods where I wouldn't mind living in a big apartment complex surrounded by family members. I feel close with them, and I don't really feel like I need to go on some big independent journey to achieve some sort of fulfillment in life. I am okay with where I'm at, and I would be comfortable in a small, cozy house, with my own chair, a big dog, and weekly game nights with family and friends to keep the life going. God help me if I don't get out of this mood fast.

Opportunities are on the table. I've got a show coming up, a pit gig open, an offer at a role in a play and, hopefully, an audition for yet another. Whether it be myself or a stranger reading this, at this time in my life, the reader should know that my passion is acting. I love to perform and my biggest dream is to make it my life's work. I have no idea if that's going to happen, but I do know that I am going to put everything I have into achieving it. The "happen" part is sortof an act of fate, and I'm not a fan of witchcraft or anything, so that's still up in the air. Pretty soon, these feelings of being okay with settling down will fly out of my head, and I'll be bitten by that bug again. 

I get bit by a lot of random little ideas. I have wanted to be a lot of things, including a comedian, a musician/songwriter, a monk, an awesome bassist, an awesome banjo player, a great fisherman, a Seinfeld expert, a "car guy", an anime fan, a "comic book junkie", a director, a "computer hacker", a great hunter, a leather designer, a samurai, a master of throwing knives at trees so that they stick there, a lone traveler, a tea expert, and a ton of other things that have popped into my head along the line. Most of these ideas have come from movies, television shows, and books. However, I don't even know what some of these entail. To be honest with you, I always thought the people in the movies who knew how to "hack the system" were cool, and the gadgets they had were neat, but I don't think that, even if I was bestowed with incredible knowledge of these technical tidbits, I would know how to use them. I don't have a bomb to stop, or secret information to gain. It's an image. That's why dreams like that don't last in my mind. 

Acting, however, is a different story. I have experience in it, and I understand why I want to be involved. I just gave a speech on the whole topic, so you know I'm serious here. Word.

Destiny...here I come!!!

My time works in cycles, not days.

Usually when I write one of these entries, I have reached the end of a cycle. Like the end of a mini-chapter of my life, in a way. Major chapters are much more important. Actually, maybe my life isn't a book at all. It could be a series of books, or a set of volumes that make up my life. Maybe my life is an entire library, rather than a single set of anything. Well, if it is a library, which I have just decided it is, then I have just reached the end of another book. This one you might skip if you end up checking that library one day, but all the same, it's there.

Do you ever feel like, even though you're a person who likes people and enjoys their family, you just don't want anyone around you at all? It confuses me. Maybe it's because I've been isolating myself while combing Vice City over and over. It could also be because I've been sucked into the computer for the last couple of nights. Whatever the reason is, I've had the urge to take an adventure in my life. I would love to just sling a pack of supplies on my back and take off into the world, not knowing what would happen or where I would end up next. But that's too difficult to do. Not because I would worry about money, or getting lost, or ending up realizing that it's difficult to sleep in a different place every night. I can deal with those things. The difficult thing is finding uncharted territory to navigate. There's no challenge around here anymore. Everything that technology works to improve, to map out every road and every bike route, to create a blueprint of earth...it leads to this sense of an inability to venture into the unknown. I wish things were organic again. 

Realistically, I think that I would consider heading out to the Kodiak or one of those tiny ports in Alaska and talking my way onto a boat. To set sail and catch fish, weather freezing temperatures and drinking black coffee out of a tin cup, and generally facing nature and the elements. It would be like proving myself to the world...and it's my own life, so why not. I set sail at some point within the next few years. Now it's in the blog, so it has to be true.

I would love to venture into a place where you have to walk from village to village, to stay with kind people that you could tell your stories of your adventures, and to fight thieves and escape from those you can't fight. To have a life to speak of when you reach the end. It all leads to one thing.

I want to be in Avatar.

The humor is in the truth.

I'd never heard the phrase until tonight. And that's alright.

Well, I didn't post last night because I had nothing to say, really. Which is sortof interesting, because by writing this, it helps me to realize when I've wasted life. I wasted life for about about 8 hours or so in the last few days, playing Vice City. But when you write your goal in your blog...for the whole world to see...you don't go back on it, gosh darnit!

So I saw some faces I hadn't in a long time tonight. Actually, one of the people that I saw was a girl that I hadn't seen since middle school. The last time I saw this girl, I was completely in a tizzy over her, and tizzy will never be brought up again. In any case, she was my major crush in middle school, and upon speaking to her, my ears got red and hot and I found myself fishing for things to say. Unbelievable. It's been like...8 years, and I still get those feelings. I guess once someone means something to you in your life, it's hard to forget that way of looking at them.

I played poker forrel (for real) tonight, and I lost. I drove all of my friends to the house to play it and lost twice as much as anybody else. Bullocks.

It was wicked snowy out today from the storm last night, and I made a nice little Tokyo drift around the corner of my street when I came home. Actually, it lasted for about five feet and, though I completely caused it to happen, I was taken by a moment of deep fear that I would damage my car or flip it over in the snow or something. But I've never done anything that caused intense damage to me or anyone around me...nothing that I couldn't handle, anyway. I was once driving down a road, too fast for conditions of course, with a girl. As I came around a corner, my car fishtailed and spun out, and I found myself spinning around in a circle of death for a little while. I can hardly explain the feeling...as if something worse than I could even comprehend was coming down on me at any second. It was like everything was suspended, and I waited for the impact. You just can't quite freak out enough in a situation like that. But nothing happened. The car skidded to a stop and I blew a tire. It's as if it wasn't my time, and life decided to help me out by contorting the road to the path of my Subaru Dreidel. Very strange...makes me think I should be doing more with my life to take advantage of that opportunity. Like taking a hold of my dream. But more infor will come on that later.

Notice I said "infor"? Well, it's just as much of a contraction as "info" is. Embrace it like Mitch would have.

I just completed five rampages.

So we're moving along on the third goal.

The trip wasn't too bad. Neutron Fist won an L.L. Bean gift certificate. Mr. Green got himself a big ol' basket 'o' snacks. Both Mr. Green and myself got to experience extreme coziness in the back seat of the car, while the other guy gave himself the other half. And in the end, we all learned that cheese and crackers will get you laid. Or at least that's what the guy with the sweater says. He also says "Don't touch me, faggot!"

I also saw a girl at the dinner meeting who I interned with this summer, but she acted as if she didn't know who I was. She also remarked to the general area that I was in that it was nice to meet me, though that was sortof delayed. What with the six month gap and all.

It was also my Mom's birthday today, in case you felt a tinglin' in your party sensors. 

So I've been writing these guys pretty late.

But that's just the way it's working out, I guess. No big deal, I suppose that's because it's the end of the semester and I'm getting into my winter break frame of mind. I now have a month where, because I don't have a job this time, I don't have to worry about absolutely anything. I don't have many goals for this break...I suppose I should set a few, eh? Well, here's a list.

1. Finish applying to all schools. I am in college now, yes, but SITBA is not the sort of place that accommodates anything more than you and your car. I will get my AS at the end of this spring semester, and that's all dandy, but it's nothing compared to the BS's that some other kids are shooting for. So I think I'm gonna go ahead and do that too, and hopefully get myself on the track to becoming a trainer of the next generation. In the world of mathematics.

2. Read the books that I've borrowed from people. This is somewhat crucial. These people need these books, they're good readin's. It's going to be tough sitting around and reading when I could be out playing, but maybe there's some worth to maintaining literacy. 

3. Beat Vice City. It's about time. San Andreas isn't getting any cheaper. 

4. Apply for Federal Aid. That kindof helps with number 1.

Those are the major goals, I think. There are tons of tiny ones, but who cares about those? I'll write them down later when the damage caused by procrastination brings them to the top of the list.

I need to write these entries when I'm not so tired, but that's tough to do when you've got sweet buds. And great friends. Take tonight, for instance. My friend Mr. Grey and I hung out, and aside from finding a lump of something that may or may not have been sweet and sour chicken on the floor of the mall next to a suspicious crater, we had a fun. Is night inferred there? Or am I Italian? You're going to have to make that decision for yourself, El Conquistador. We wandered around the mall for a while, went to Best Buy and achieved nothing, and finally decided to head down to a local coffee shop. I love this joint. The people are friendly, the atmosphere is comfortable, and they have chinese checkers. It's so cool, they even had a jazz band playing and acted like they didn't notice. We sat, drank coffee, played a game of "name-the-evolved-form-of-this-pokemon", and almost didn't notice when the old guy overlooking our booth began to moan, sing, cry, or laugh into empty space; we couldn't quite decide what he was doing. It was extremely bizarre and we cried. 

Tomorrow I go to a dinner meeting with Neutron Fist, Mr. Green, and the fat one. I have heard that prizes will be involved. Recipients, even.

There's going to be a problem here.

The time that is displayed as the time I posted this is incorrect. It's four hours earlier. This may be because I screwed up something or haven't set a time zone on my account or something crazy-go-nuts like that, and I may even be ridiculed for this when I'm famous, but we'll press on.

So yesterday, I was driving with my sister. Went to Walmart, Dunkin' Donuts, and so on. We get to a red light, and an SUV pulls up behind me. Now, when it was something like fifty feet away, I saw the blob that was the driver's face. It was tilted in a certain position, unmoving, and as I looked in my rearview mirror, the car came closer and closer, decelerating constantly. His face never moved, tilted to the left, and I suddenly became aware that he was staring right at me into my mirror. He had a fixed smile that suggested something like eight sacrificed pigs in his trunk. There was no reason for this guy to be so happy, but he had known I was there, watching him, from fifty feet up the road at least, and God knows how much further. It was the most horrifying and hilarious experience of the day. The suspected occupant of the SUV appears below.

So, there's something that I need to define. Many of you may have seen me refer to something called "truck kids" in my last entry. When I say "Truck Kids", I am speaking of the students at the school that I attend (let's call it "Somewhere In The Between Academy") who sit in their truck and appear to have no other function. I (truck) kid you not. There are two of them, and the first time I encountered them, I was confused. Most of the time, when you sit in your truck, you may listen to music, or decide to drive, or have a windowtalk with a passerby. Not so with the TK's. I watched them, for a good minute, be responsive. The TK's sat side by side in the cab, with the windows down, and stared. One of them had sunglasses on, which he may have been staring at, or he may have been staring past them. It's hard to say. I was forced to park next to them a few times and had to get into and out of my car with one of the TK's less than three feet from me. I could have spoken to him, but why? He was busy sitting and staring at the time. I have never pulled into that parking lot without the truck kids in their space, like a welcome mat. It's a homey feeling. Since that entire campus of SITBA is moving in with another, and that campus is turning into a shop class high school, I fear for the TK's. They will be forced out of their natural habitat, and that might lead them to lash out or become segway kids or some shit. I'm just glad I knew things as they were. 

This is the most consistent I've ever been with an online journal or otherwise, since I've already beat once in a row. Let's see if that continues. 

Ahhhhh here goes.

Well, that's the way I typed it the first time anyway, so I decided to leave it like that. 

I'm honestly not sure how many 'h''s are supposed to be in that "Ah", and I'm kindof obsessive about being correct on those sort of things. So who makes the rules? Kenan and Kel, which I won't even check the spelling of, involved a lot of this "Ah, here goes." Well, I checked to see what Google had to say about this. See the number to the left of the "Ah+Z" to discover how many results were uncovered when "X here goes" was typed into the search box. X=Ah+Z, where Z=f(h).

27 "Ah"

3 "Ahh"

3 "Ahhh"

2 "Ahhhh"

3 "Ahhhhh"

1 "Ahhhhhh"

0 "Ahhhhhhh"

0 "Ahhhhhhhh"

2 "Ahhhhhhhhh"

0 "Ahhhhhhhhhh"

1 "Ahhhhhhhhhhh"

2 "Ahhhhhhhhhhhh"

Interesting. Persuasive, indeed. I can't quite understand why a single "h" would prompt 27 results, but I suppose I'm in the minority anyway with my pitiful 3 peers who feel the same way. I am confident that this is the first study done on this subject.

This blog is going to be about nothing. I have a lot of things that I've recently realized I should be writing down. The characters in my life deserve a place in my stories, and I want to remember them. There's Brent Maynard. There's truck kids. There library youtube man. Faces that I won't want gone from my life at some point. So I will preserve them here. A little late, to be sure, but one out of four is better than nothing.

This is a test.